Saturday, June 20, 2009

Father's Day


I know it's tomorrow but what the fuck.

Because of you:

I am the artist I am today because I was blessed with your teaching and knowledge of art in order to get where I am today, in order to even BE and artist it all started off with you.

I am a happy, crazy, go lucky person instead of an annoying cranky bitch like mom. You help keep the balance.

I am able to see the positives and joys in life and always have high hopes because you always tell me to reach higher and keep going, to never give up.

I know how to stay strong, throw a good football and not waist my time doing uneccessary bullshit to myself. Instead I see what a joy it is to play a good game.

I was able to experience anime and it's new style of animation, it's lack of limits and wonderful action to drive me to draw and want to become and animator.

I was able to see new things, not typical things but new erotic, out of this world things.

I am able to enjoy sci-fi, fantasy, weird shit, the beautiful.

I have someone to relate to, to show off to my friends and never be embarassed, to be proud of and to say 'That's MY dad and NOT yours'

Everyone wishes they had a father like you, and that feels great.

I know what it's like to be a kid, to enjoy being a kid, and to know it's OKAY to be a kid.

I am proud to say that when people say I look TONS like you more than mom, I'm happy.

I don't need any kind of sibling to have to play some video games with or watch a couple of cartoons, I have you.

I have FUN with my life even when it seems down, I get over things fast, ALWAYS have a smile, and can't really get mad.

I am proud to be who I am, you make me feel like I'm the god of this puny world, I am not afraid to show you what I can do because I know you'd always be proud of me.

I am here, I am alive.

I love.

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Dad may have only gave half, but to me he gave it his all. They say compared to mom and him, I look tons like him, and baby, that feels good to hear.

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Tons of symbolism for dad in this picture:

He loves Star Wars, the color orange, comic books and me.

He's my dad and not yours.

I love you .

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Karma


     Alright awesome, so here's a nice little self portrait I did on this art program called OpenCanvas. It's pretty cool because once you get everything set up you can have online drawing sessions with a friend or two and it's pretty awesome. Again, I'm sitting in my little corner of a couch that's against the wall and facing the television, isn't it pretty funny, even though I have my headphones on listening to music the television is still on. Why? It gives me a sense of security when I'm at my house, alone. I have no idea how or why, but I just seem to feel more comofrtable that way. When I was younger, and just starting to get used to being at home alone, I would go into the kitchen and get the biggest butcher's knife possible and keep it by my side just in case you know, anything funny was to happen. Now it's just a turn on of the television and a nice relaxing sit down while I listen to my music.

     I've been thinking lately about how my parents haven't been such cock-asses to me lately, and I'm a bit happy and yet dissappointed/upset to maybe know the reason why. As declared before, I just recently graduated from High School, but I have been the age 18 since March. The graduation from High School maybe opened their eyes in seeing that I'm not a child anymore and that now I'm an adult. It just really twists my nipples to think that because of the fact that it needed a graduation for them to just let me stay up past 12 and not complain about it or stop bugging me about childish things. But hey, what it is it what it is, and it's been alright so far. I really don't want to get too excited just in case I could be wrong, because there is always that one point, y'know, when you're happy about something a little too much and then it just gets fucked up and you're like 'WELL that was a waist of happiness now wasn't it?!' so I refuse to talk about how good it's going anymore, because watch today be that one day /even if my mother, the one who causes the ultimate damnation of my soul when she's in a rampage mode which is almost always isn't home at the moment and is hopefully having a swell time with her female compadres./

   So in a change of subject, a few moments ago I joined the ever-so-knowing website called Twitter. I've come to discover it's just really a status updater and it's truly a waist of the small seconds of my life, but hell, I made one anyway so I best enjoy it now shouldn't I? Basically if you just did something that you want the world to know, you type it next to your name in the least amount of words possible. This proves that humans' attention spans are slowly diminishing and really just die out and lose focus after reading two fucking lines of something. Or maybe people are just extremely lazy or nosey, whatever the case or reason, I joined it, so I'm probably just as bad aren't I?

I'm only human.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Introduction


So, here's a little something to increase my maturity (Yeah right) There's nothing like the feeling of starting something fresh as you're about to take an extreme turn in life, making new decisions and having new thoughts.

Okay so, what the fuck am I on about?

I'm an 18 year old, fresh out of high school student, ready to be on my way to college, art school more like it, ready to open my eyes to something new, something finally different than from the stupid uneccessary shit I had to deal with 9th through 12th grade. Oh trust me, there were good times, I made a whole new family you know, made tons of friends yadda yadda/ but there's always that you know, fine line, that needs a crossing.

So, since I'm starting the school life fresh, why not try out something new on the internet, like blogging? I've never would've thought I'd have the capacity to actually make a damn blog, but here I am, able to post random art images I've made /and/ state my mind. Well, I'm sure the art images would have relation, but you're getting the point. Hopefully my life will be more exhilerating and at least with this I can state my /true/ thoughts and feelings, no matter whom or what sees it. It's a blog it's what I'm supposed to do.

This should be fun.